Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Wiping Addicion

"Ahhhhh!" I screamed as I found yet another door frame stained with a long rust colored streak.  Sickened with the evidence that confronted me at every turn, I marched with righteous indignation up to Briz.  "There are boogers on every surface of this house.  This is one of those things seasoned moms keep from new moms so the race can continue.  I can't confront it.  After eleven years of it, I get too angry.

Sweet Briz approached the topic on the way to the pet store to purchase a new tree frog.  "Honey, you have got to stop wiping boogers."  he said sternly.  "When we get home, get the bucket and scrub brush.  You know what you need to do." 

"But Dad!"  she whined.  "I try so hard!  You don't understand!  It's like smoking."

"Are you saying you are addicted to booger wiping?"

"Yes.  I try and try, but before I know it, I've wiped it."

"That's understandable.  Next time your urges get the better of you, and you feel bad after you've caved to your addiction, grab a rag and get it while it's nice and soft.  Then you won't have these hour long cleaning sessions.

"O.K. Dad."

What's a mom to do but introduce a new skill?

Tonight was embroidery.  You guessed it.  On fresh new handkerchiefs.


  1. Now she just needs to remember to carry around her handi-craft

  2. Good idea Kitten! I also worry that she will remember to carry the kerchiefs around.


  3. Just needed you to know that I dry heaved through most of this post, my gag reflex was activated. I could sympathize except that with my kids it is wiping poop on the bathroom wall. I don't know which is worse. Do you think they remember to wash their hands????